Fairytale of Princess Popcorn
by Jedula
Summary: Princess Popcorn is your average princess... but where is her prince to save her when she gets into trouble? Story includes Johnny Depp, Elliot Minor, Eminem, and Jedward.


Once upon a time, there was a girl called Princess Popcorn, and she lived in the kingdom of Minorasia. This land was known for its use of magic, and good wizards were everywhere, performing spells to entertain the people of Minorasia and to make their lives easier. However, sometimes there were bad wizards who would try to make people's lives bad, but luckily King Johnny Depp took their magical powers away from them before they could do any harm.

xxx

One day, Princess Popcorn decided to go for a walk through the enchanted forest by herself, even though this was forbidden by her father, as many dangers lurked in the forest, but Princess Popcorn was not afraid of this, and so went into the forest on her own. At first there was lots of thorns and vines just waiting to injure the princess, and a couple of times she nearly tripped over objects on the forest floor, but after wandering for many hours she made her way into a clearing in the middle of the forest. This clearing was the most beautiful thing that Princess Popcorn had ever seen, filled with brightly coloured flowers and a sparkling river running through the middle, as well as woodland creatures hopping around delicately.

"This place is amazing," Princess Popcorn whispered to herself, "I wonder why my father did not want me to come here?" Just as the words came out of her mouth, a figure appeared at the edges of the clearing. The princess was unable to see who it was as it was too dark, but when they stepped into the light in the clearing, she was dazzled to see that it was a man, but strangely this man sparkled when he was in the sunlight. Slowly he made his way towards her, making sure not to scare the princess away.

"Fair maiden, why have you come this far into the forest? Have you not heard the stories about what happens to those who do?" The princess had not heard these stories before, and she liked to hear stories.

"Will you tell me about the stories?"

"Certainly," a smile appeared on his face. "There are legends that there is a magical creature that has lived deep in this forest for hundreds of years, and he brings misery to all those that meet him. Would you like me to continue?" Princess Popcorn nodded. "There are those who are brave enough to try and take this monster down, but once they venture into the forest, they never come out again."

"Wow," the princess spoke. She was just about to ask the man more about this creature, when all of a sudden, a Knight appeared in the clearing and stood in between Princess Popcorn and the man. The princess recognised the Knight as one of the Minor Knights, and they were known as five of the most powerful Knights in the land, protecting the people from every type of evil.

"Princess," he addressed her, and she recognised him as Ed, the princess's favourite out of all the Minor Knights, "why are you talking to this lowly subject?"

"Oh Knight Ed, he was telling me the most interesting story about a monster that lives in this forest!" However, Knight Ed was not as impressed by this as the princess, and he turned to the man.

"Sir, we bid you good day." He pulled Princess Popcorn on to the horse, and suddenly they were flying through the forest at great speed.

"Why did you take me away from him so suddenly?"

Knight Ed sighed – he liked the princess, but sometimes found her inquisitive nature a lot to handle. "Your father has requested you return back to the castle immediately to meet with Prince Eminem to arrange the details of your wedding." Princess Popcorn sighed too because she did not like the prince who her father had arranged for her to be married too, as she found him to be very cruel towards the people in Minorasia. Sometimes she wished to herself that she would be able to choose a husband for herself – someone who was very handsome and who would make her laugh a lot. However, before she got too deep into her thoughts, Knight Ed spoke again.

"I also have strict instructions that you are to prepare to move from your quarters in the castle into the royal quarters so that you are ready when you take over from your father as ruler of the kingdom." As he spoke, Princess Popcorn could see the castle appearing majestically over the landscape, and she could tell that they had been preparing for the prince's arrival, as all the servants were hurrying around to ensure that everything was ready. Once they arrived at the castle front, Knight Ed helped Princess Popcorn off of the horse, and she was instantly led away by one of her personal servants so she could get ready.

xxx

When Prince Eminem arrived, King Johnny Depp greeted him with amazing fanfare, but the prince remained unimpressed and headed straight into the castle so that he could eat from the feast. The King also did not approve of his manners, but no other prince was willing to marry into Minorasia because of the rumours of an ancient monster that dwelled deep in the heart of the kingdom.

Princess Popcorn arrived into the feast hall a short time after the prince, and even though she was the most beautiful thing in the room, Prince Eminem barely glanced at her and continued to eat as much as he could. This was clear to all in the room, especially Knight Ed, who was guarding the entrance to the feast hall, and it made him angry. He was in love with the princess, but the King would never allow her to marry someone who wasn't royalty, and she would be disowned if she went behind the King's back.

Throughout the whole night, King Johnny Depp talked excitedly about the wedding arrangements, but the prince did not say a word on the subject, letting his servants deal with the details. Once the feast had finished, they all retired to their quarters, except for Knight Ed, who decided to go for a walk around the castle walls. Seeing that he was upset, Knight Alex, who was also guarding that night, followed him.

"Why were you looking at the princess like that?" Knight Alex asked, even though he knew about Knight Ed's feelings for Princess Popcorn.

"I do not want to see the princess end up with a bully for a husband. She deserves someone better." Knight Ed sat down on a hill where he knew no-one would be able to see them talking.

"But where is your place to say it?" Knight Alex stood in front of him, repeating what he had already said hundreds of times before. "You know our ranking - we do not have any authority in their lives. Anything we say to them would get us removed from the castle, and then what would your chances be like? The only thing you can do is watch over her and make sure she does not get hurt." Knight Ed stood up and paced around, before replying.

"I know, I know..." He looked back at Knight Alex, who was waiting for him to go back inside the castle like he always did, but this night he did something different. "I think I'm going to head into the forest for a bit."

"Wait up! You don't want to go into the forest alone at night!" And so Knight Alex headed after Knight Ed into the forest, where things were about to happen that no-one expected.

xxx

As Princess Popcorn was about to sleep, King Johnny Depp entered her room and sat on the end of her bed.

"Popcorn," he began softly, "I have to tell you that until the wedding, you are to stay within the grounds of the castle." The princess was unhappy with this news, as she spent most of her day exploring outside the castle.

"Why father?"

"It is because we have received news that there is someone who is planning to take you far away from here before the wedding, and I just cannot take that risk."

"But I'll be careful!" The princess pleaded with her father, "I promise I won't let anyone take me away!"

However, the King would not give into her pleas. "I'm sorry, but you have to. It's for the best." He left the princess's room, and she sat in her bed, angry at her father. After being told that she couldn't go outside the castle anymore, that was the only thing that she could think of, and soon she decided to go out for one last explore in the enchanted forest, in the hope that she would meet up with the mysterious sparkling man again.

xxx

Walking through the forest at night was a lot harder to do than Princess Popcorn had thought before. With every step she took, trees and plants seemed to attack her, and it seemed to be taking her longer to reach the clearing, but eventually she made it, and waited to see if the man would appear again. As she was about to look at some of the flowers she could still see in the dark, the princess heard two voices talking, and they both seemed familiar to her. She decided to investigate closer, but before she took a step, the mysterious man stepped in front of her.

"I see you have ventured back here," his mouth turned into a small smirk. "Some may say that is very foolish."

"The story you told me made me curious," she replied, having forgotten about the other voices she'd heard. "Tell me, what is your name?"

"I go by the name of Jedward, your royal highness." And as he spoke, Jedward produced a small vial of liquid from his pocket. "This," he stared her straight in the eye, "is a potion I call vodka. It has the ability to make a person happy, funny, and feel invincible." He handed it to Princess Popcorn. "Drink up, it only lasts for a short time."

Nervously, the princess took the bottle from Jedward and drank the vodka potion in one gulp. She waited for the happy feeling to come, but instead, Princess Popcorn began to feel very faint. She looked towards Jedward for support, but to her horror, he had morphed from a sparkling man into a two-headed demon, and before she knew it, her head hit the floor, when a laugh came from Jedward's mouths.

xxx

When Princess Popcorn awoke, she was surrounded by images with strange symbols written all over them, and when she tried to move closer, she found that she was tied to a chair. Just as she was about to shout for help, she heard multiple voices coming towards her, and it sounded like they were arguing with each other.

"Why the hell do you think this is my fault? It always seems to be my bloody fault doesn't it?"

"Well it certainly wasn't my fault! And you're the one who's always screwing up!"

"You think _he's_ the screw up? Who's the one who lost the big bag of treasure after saying how easy it was going to be?" And in walked the Minor Knights... At least, the princess thought it was the Minor Knights, but none of them had their armour on, and they were all speaking differently.

"Um, little help here?" Princess Popcorn was surprised as the words came out of her mouth, as she had never spoken like that before.

"Oh, sorry," one of the Knights muttered as they untied her from the ropes. Once freed, she stood up, only to nearly fall over again. Luckily, Knight Ed was behind the princess to catch her.

"Let's get out of here," Knight Alex suggested as Knight Ed picked Princess Popcorn up. But as they were making their way through the door, Jedward stopped them.

"Thinking of taking her somewhere? I'm afraid I can't let you do that." And with a snap of his fingers, a hundred evil ninja monkeys appeared in front of them.

Putting the princess down, the Minor Knights fought against the evil ninja monkeys, and Jedward's expression turned to one of shock when he saw that the Knights were winning the battle. Mere moments later, the monkeys had been defeated, and the Knights turned towards Jedward.

"No, you can't hurt me..." He backed into a different room, and away from the sight of Princess Popcorn, they dealt with him, emerging minutes later.

"Where are we then?" She asked them after a few seconds of silence.

"Japan," Knight Ed replied.

"The land of the short people," Knight Ali murmured quietly, but still loud enough for everyone to here. Knight Ed looked at him accusingly.

"What?" Knight Ali said innocently.

Knight Ed laughed sarcastically. "That was obviously meant for me, so why didn't you just say it to me?"

"How was it obviously meant for you?"

"You're all talk aren't you, but when we actually fight, you're all 'I'm gonna stay at the back out of the way' when we need you to fight!"

As Knight Ali began to argue back, Knight Dan grabbed hold of the princess's arm and said "Let's get out of here before they start on each other," with Knight Ted trying to pull Knight Ali out of the argument.

Once Princess Popcorn had left with Knights Dan, Ted and Ali, Knight Alex turned to Knight Ed. "You know, we won't be able to get back to Minorasia now, so you should go for it with Popcorn man." He placed a hand on Knight Ed's shoulder and pushed him towards the door that the others had just left through.

xxx

Being outside in Japan was an extraordinary thing for Princess Popcorn, with all the bright colours and flashing lights. Everything was a million times more vibrant than it had been in Minorasia, and she didn't miss it at all, except for her father. It took her a couple of moments to realise that the Minor Knights had left her, and that she was on her own. The princess began to panic, but luckily Knight Ed came towards her, and instantly she felt better.

"So how are you finding this?" He asked her, but he was very obviously nervous about something.

Princess Popcorn thought to herself for a moment before replying. "I like it. I mean, it's a lot different to what I'm used to, but all the colours and lights and..." But before she could finish, Knight Ed had pulled her into a kiss, something that the princess had never experienced before. It was soft with a slight edge of built-up anticipation to it, and warm like syrup, and... perfect for her.

"I didn't know..." But Princess Popcorn was interrupted again with another kiss, and so she melted into the moment, knowing that she was truly happy for the first time in her life.


End file.
